Three Guys Walk Into a Bar

Dear Movies,

Michael: "...So 'ee sez to 'er, 'ee sez, 'how do you fink oi rang the doorbell?!"
Morgan: "HAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Liam: "Oh, I get it! With his boner! Hahaha! I love jokes!"

Love,
Brendan

Salt of The Middle Earth

Dear Movies,
The Hobbit movie is being delayed by SAG and other groups. I say fuck unions! Guerilla filmmaking all the way!
James

The Boys Are Back in Town

Dear Movies,
When is something good coming out to watch? The Town, when is The Town coming out? John Hamm and Blake Lively so better fuck.

James

A Very Special Episode of Dear Movies...

Dear Television,

More crossover episodes, please. Actually, scratch that...could you please just start crossing over entire series? Here are a few ideas...

-Two and a Half Mad Men, a Gossip Girl & a Pizza Place
-NYPD Shield
-Boston Legal (A mashup of Boston Public & Boston Legal)
-It's Always Sunny in Jericho
-Who wants to be The Simpsons?
-Saved by the Bell: Deep Space 9
-Monk's Anatomy
-The Mod-ern Family Squad
-Battlestar GaLOSTica
-House M.D. of Payne

There you go, Television. You can just have those. I don't need 'em.

Brendan

Hubba Hubba

Dear Movies,
Thanks for listening and re-releasing Hubble 3D. Im beyond excited to go to the theater right now. Youre the best,

James

Christmas Come Early

Dear Movies,
I really want to go to see you tonight so release Tron: Legacy now. Thanks.

James

Look out The Avengers & Valentines Day...

Dear Movies,

Get ready for the ensemble romantic comedy of a lifetime: THE INTERNET!

Google - George Clooney
Yahoo - Mickey Rourke
Wikipedida - Ian Mckellan
AOL - Jerry Stiller
AIM - Ben Stiller
TMZ - Ashton Kutcher
Twitter - Miley Cyrus
Amazon - Julia Roberts
Aint It Cool - Jonah Hill

Featuring special cameos from Criss Angel as a Proxy Site, Will Ferrell as Funny or Die, and an entire army of CGI Lolcats.

We're gonna be zillionaires.

Yours,
Brendan