Real Talk

Dear Movies,

Not long ago, I had a dream that a friend and I were having lunch at a country club with James Woods. However, I didn't realize it was James Woods until my friend made a face after I said, "Only a handful of James Woods movies are actually worth watching."

What could this mean?

Brendan

Harrison Bored

Dear Movies,
I accept that Harrison Ford loves to just get stoned and fuck around all day now. So can we get him in a Judd Apatow movie already so he can do just that and I get to see him back on the silver screen in something not god awful? Youre the best,

James

Paper Tiger

Dear Movies,
Please have Michel Gondry or Wes Anderson direct Iron Man 3D. 3D meaning they put a play on in the park. Thanks.

James

The fifth musketeer

Dear Movies,

What film could this possibly be for? I'd like to buy my ticket in advance, please!

Thanks!

Brendan

Im Not Talking Trash Man, Im Talking Truth

Dear Movies,
Stop with the bullshit, start showing something thats real.

fuck you,
james

Dear Pixar...

Dear Movies,

I don't think my heart can take much more of these Pixar movies. The balance of incredibly fun to terribly sad is tipping one direction.

Yours,
Brendan

Thanks, Hollywood

Dear Hollywood,

I'm probably on some kind of watch list now. And not the good kind, like Netflix.

Thanks a lot, jerk.
Brendan Walsh